Funny blonde jokes plz!?

I love my mom soooo much and she's been through a lot lately... She loves blonde jokes so I want to tell her some and see a smile on her face again! So plz tell me some funny jokes!!!!

Thank you sooo much!

Funny blonde jokes plz!?-Myspace pictures

A blond's house is on fire so she calls the fire department, then they say "ok ma'am how do we get to your house?"

then the blonde says, "duh! big red truck!"

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A blond was trying to kill herself in her backyard and when the neighbor saw her there, he asked why she had the rope around her arm. The blond says, "when it was around my neck i couldn't breathe!!"

Funny blonde jokes plz!?

-(Myspace images myspace.com)

Blonde Cops

A blonde cop stops blonde motorist and asks for her driving license.

The Motorist scuffles around in her purse and can't find it. She says to the cop, "I must have left it at home officer."

The cop says, "Well, do you have any kind of identification?" The motorist scuffles around in her purse again, and finds a pocket mirror.

She looks at it and says to the cop, "All I have is this picture of myself." The cop says, "Let me see it, then." So the blonde motorist gives the mirror to the blonde cop, who looks at it, and replies, "Well, if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn't have even pulled you over. You can go now."

Dead Bird

One day a blonde and a brunette were walking down to the grocery store when the brunette pointed out to the blonde "oh, hey look at that dead bird.."

The blonde looks around around up in the sky for a few minutes and says "hmm, I don't see any dead ones."

Walking the Dogs

A blonde was walking her dogs when a man walking in the opposite direction says "oh my, you have such beautiful dogs.. what are their names?"

The blonde replies "Well, the taller one is Timex and the shorter one is Rolex."

The man responds "Huh.. that's interesting.. why did you name them such names?"

The blonde sighs and shakes her head "Everyone keeps asking me the same thing... duhh, what else can you name your watch dogs??"

Cheating

A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.

She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head.

Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..."

The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!"
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead board a plane headed from San Fransisco to Minneapolis. After they have been in the air for about 15 minutes, the pilot says over the intercom, "Due to the loss of one of our four engines, we will be an hour late to Minneapolis. We apologize for this inconvenience." After hearing this message, the brunette says, "Damn it! I'm going to be late for my meeting."

About 30 minutes later the pilot's voice comes over the intercom again: "Due to the loss of the second of our four engines, we will now be two hours late to Minneapolis. We apologize for this inconvenience." After hearing this message, the redhead says: "I'm going to be late for my meeting too." About 30 minutes later, the pilot comes over the intercom once again: "Due to the loss of the third of our four engines, we will now be four hours late to Minneapolis. We are very sorry for this inconvenience." After hearing this message, the blond says, "If we lose another engine, we're going to be up here all day."
u see three woman ones a brunet ones a red head and ones a blonde well they fell from the sky whitch one stoped and asked for directions good guess.
OK THIS ONE IS OLDIE

a blonde lady was driving her car and she's running late to her work. when she got to the parking lot, there was no parking space for her. she prayed...

"oh God please give me a space to park and I swear give up sex, alcohol, and clothing".

a man pulled out from the parking lot and she said,

"nevermind Lord, i found one"
One of my favorites:

A blonde decides she is tired of all the dumb blonde jokes and decides to dye her hair brown to avoid the stereotype.

One day she is driving down a country road and passes a farm. Outside the barn is a man and a dog shepherding some sheep. Deciding she is hungry and would like some lamb for dinner, she pulls over and approaches the shepherd. She asks him: "If I can guess the exact number of sheep in your herd, can I have one?"

The shepherd decides to accept this wager, and is very annoyed when the blonde counts quickly and comes up with "56!" He grudgingly allows her to pick out a sheep.

As she is walking back to her car with the animal under her arm, the shepherd walks up behind her and asks: "If I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"