Need Jokes.?

Long story short - someone in my family (Not giving personal info) needs to give a best man speech. The one thats the funniest. So, can you give us some good jokes that are easy enough and from which I don't have to give personal info? Plz, help! And this does belong to this catagory, cause I'm asking for jokes and this is where the jokes are! Thanks to every one who's kind enough to help!

Need Jokes.?-Myspace pictures

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

OK, so what's the speed of dark?

How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked

something.

Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.

Need Jokes.?

-(Myspace images myspace.com)

well i have one that's funny in a kind of funny way- So this guy walks into a bar...

He says "Ouch"
Three guys walked into a bar...the fourth one ducked.
if king kong went to hong kong and died their what would they put on his coffin,

A lid.
zthere was three man Russian English and Mexican

their thing to do was if someone riches the gold at the top which is 1000 miles long will get the gold and princess Fiona

Russian climbs the Mexican scream your shoes r untied!!

so he look es down and falls

English wax next but same happened to him

mexican the last so they scream YOUR sHOES R UNTIDE!!

and mexucan says what the heck r u talkin abut i dont wear shoe laces
go to www.innocentenglish.com; it was one of the best sites i could find for jokes, funny misphrases, and such.